The Myth of Rectitude

The second great Myth – Why do so many people need to be right?

Responses to different interpretations and/or opinions on issues can be so rigid, intolerant, and unforgiving that they can, and do, destroy relationships. Positions taken can be inflexible and stubborn even in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary. Some find it almost impossible to let go of preconceived convictions.

The root of the matter lies in personal needs, and we all have them. We all need safety, security, and possibly acceptance by others since we’re social beings for the most part. Some go further to expect status within their selected groups and perhaps even the fullest measure of freedom to be whoever they believe themselves to be. Such needs are compelling!

Self-interest is a powerful influence, and individual safety and security needs will always prevail.  Self-esteem and dominance needs can dictate responses in some situations, driven by assumed ‘wants / desires’ and also by fear and greed-driven motives, but these are much less common in the experiences of most. Yet again, habit-based behaviors are responsible for many frictions, although these may well have deeper, underlying reasons. In all versions, however, it would be rare that the outcomes justify the immensely destructive energies that are vested in maintaining fixed positions against all comers!

How would a Wisdom-based approach contribute?

Wisdom is the WAY, acknowledgement, and acceptance of the natural tendency towards perfection that’s an inherent part of creation – the unfolding of the universe in our fullest awareness. It is all around us and we have the sole option of recognizing or ignoring it, just that!

‘Way’ is such a small yet hardworking term; reflect that it can represent at least three different applications. Firstly, it is a path – do you know the way to San Jose? Secondly, it is a process – do you know the way to do this? It is also a perspective – at least that’s the way I see it. Each of these applications has a sense of movement, dynamism, and even of the future. There’s no impression of a static position, nor of any requirement for defense. Anticipations will prevail over expectations.

Right-ness, or rectitude is, however, a false security, if for no other reason than the present is fluid, constantly emerging. We exist, and are locked into, in a sea of change as the present progresses. It is, and always will be, the way we experience reality.

Everyone can be, and usually is, right. There’s truth to be found everywhere we look; our challenge is to find it, embrace, assimilate and value it; this way we grow and prosper.

All we ever need to do is to move, forward, to get on the right track, and to take yet one more small step towards perfection. This is the WAY!

#selfdevelopment              #barrierstogrowth            #personalwisdom


  • David E.C. Huggins

    David Huggins has fully enjoyed a lifetime of experience as a military officer and as a behavioural scientist, supporting businesses and similar enterprises, at both organizational and individual levels, through leadership coaching. A contemplative Christian, he is devoted to contributing love, value, comfort, and continuity to this diverse world. He resides in Campbellville, Ontario, with his lovely and talented artist wife, Judy. Huggins David